Should open marriages be the norm? 4 people talk about it
The institution of marriage and even dating in modern times is an exclusive relationship. Neither party is supposed to gain emotional or sexual benefits from someone else.
However, monogamy hasn’t always been the way the world worked. Traditional African culture has always been polygamous or polyandrous.
What existed in ancient times was “Male Mates Guarding” because mates were scarce and they needed to take care of their offspring.
Although few ancient tribes practiced monogamy, the organized government that started from the ancient Greeks and Romans also practiced monogamy because their men were only allowed to marry one woman.
Christianity also came and solidified the practice of monogamy.
Uche think, “Cheating is due to the death of religion. I don’t think open relationships work.
“The religion brought with its morality, which kept the collective together. If there is no God, there is no rule giver. If there is no rule giver, everything is / should be allowed.
“Even though people always cheat, it’s not about acceptance or honor. My simple point is that the absence of religion has lowered the bar.”
Lanre said, “You cannot suppress religious consideration. Perhaps this is why cheating is rampant. Because people ignore religious consideration.”
However, Sabi boyz does not agree with both. He says, “Monogamy is failing today: one-person sexual exclusivity for the rest of our lives.
“How is that possible today in a world of seven billion people, with human biology? Having sex with a person is like vowing to eat instant noodles for the rest of your life.
“That aside, cheating as we know it is just people who willfully choose to be deceitful and force someone else to uphold the standards of sexual exclusivity while going behind their backs for it. sleeping with someone else
“Why is this happening? Why do people believe that sex operates in the same domain as love? Why promise sexual monogamy to someone knowing full well that you don’t intend to keep them?
“Cheating is much worse and more damaging than two people accepting their sexual limitations and coming together despite it. Men are naturally polygamous (a liking for many women at the same time). Women are serially monogamous (a liking for one. particular man for a certain period).
“Human beings are not monogamous, although this is practiced by a very small minority of the population in its truest form.
“The reason we have so many problems today is not that people love each other less, it’s because we are following a system that does not benefit either party.
“Whether we like it or not, we will always come back to our humanity. Entering an open relationship. The right way will eliminate half of the problems that most people have in monogamy. Of course, most people cannot and would never accept open monogamy, which of course is.
“Another reason people pursue monogamy despite cheating is that they believe that love is sex and that sex is love. But the two operate in separate places in the brain.
“I should also add that partners who cheat pursue monogamy as it allows them to control their partner and monitor their movements even if they do not meet the norms of monogamy.. ”
Ore feel that; “The polarization of male and female mating dynamics has been distorted by modern society.
“Monogamy brings stress, people get bored quickly, especially women. With open relationships, there is no need to lie or cheat or whatever you do and live stress free. is the most practical relationship model in modern society. “
Which side are you on? Do you agree with Lanre and Uche that we have loosened our grip on the morality brought by religion or Ore and Sabi Boyz that monogamy is an anomaly?